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The Real Housewives of the Atlantic Ocean

2 Jun

Hurricane Season began yesterday, June 1st.  Meteorologists everywhere have their eyes glued to the Atlantic Ocean.  This time of year, she gets a little ticked off and shows us just how much she cares for how we take care of mother earth!

I’m writing this post to the National Hurricane Center.  I’ve been very displeased with the hurricane names that have been tagged to such monstrosities over the years.  Taking the face off of cities, uprooting people’s lives, and disrupting the melodic tunes of life.  It’s staccato presence emanates distrust, hatred, and downright disrespect.  So, I’ve decided to provide my 2010 Hurricane Name List.  Stop cursing our children named Katrina, Isabel, Hugo, and Bertha!  It’s time to give these bad mama jamas a more suitable name.

A=Assinine

B=Baby Daddy

C=C U Next Tuesday (I guess you can figure that out)

D=Demon

E=Evicted

F=Facelift

G=Grouchy

H=Hooker

I=Ignorant

J=Jailbird

K=Keyser Soze (cue The Usual Suspects)

L=Layaway

M=Maneater

N=Negro, Please

O=Obesity

P=Pissed

Q=Quickie

R=Republican

S=S.O.L. (We all should know that acronym)

T=Terrorist

U=Unfair

V=VD

W=Welfare

X=XXX (called “Triple X”)

Y=Yeast Infection

Z=Zombie

This is not ridiculous.  I’m dead serious. Let’s give these (female dogs) a name that will have everyone evacuating at first warning.

Haters…strike 3!

2 Jun

The most over-used word of the new millenium has to be hater.  Everytime I turn around, there’s a song, a news article, or a blog where someone is paying homage to the new American pasttime.  Move over baseball, it seems that hating on someone involves more sweat than swinging a bat!

I for one could care less.  Well, let me put it this way.  It is quite unnerving to constantly hear others criticize your efforts. But at the end of the day, he or she (in my case, she) can kick rocks with an open-toe shoe! (Thanks Brandy for that one!)  We all judge others, behind there backs and to their faces.  Maybe the latter takes major guts, but haters mostly spill their displeasures when you’re not around.  It seems that old high school games somehow made it into adulthood.  More than ever, cue Real Housewives, hating has become the new black!

So, I’m making a declaration to anti-haters everywhere.  I charge all of you, to never let the word “hater” part from your lips.  Stop giving them so much credit, and for God’s sakes stop accepting their friend requests on social networking sites.  I would prefer you surround yourself with people who are “lovers”…who want to see you do well, and are ashamed of even giving  jealousy a voice.

Haters pack your bags, if anything else can fit.  Sayanora. Arrivederci. Ciao. Au Revoir. Get the hell outta here.  Pick either valediction.  It’s time to take a closer look at your life, get a more positive hobby, and recycle the time you’ve wasted tending to others.  Don’t you just hate me for saying that! =)

Arizona…secede or unite?

21 May

If you haven’t heard about the SB1070 Arizona Immigration Law, then I take it you’re not much of a news watcher.  Neither am I, but I couldn’t help myself when I overheard the recent news that Arizona is crying and damn near pouting about the nay-sayers of neighboring states.  The immigration law, a.k.a. SB1070, allows police officers to profile potential illegal immigrants.  The law, which goes into effect in July, gives officers the permission to demand citizenship papers of a person that they suspect to be here illegally.  This type of action has also been referred to as racial profiling.   

I certainly understand both sides of the debate in response to the new immigration law.  In the wake of 9-11, American citizenship should not be taken lightly for anyone that desires it.  If an immigrant wants to become a citizen, he or she should definitely go through the necessary steps to obtaining residency the right way.  But…and that’s a bold one, there’s the far-right side of myself.  That understands that not all laws are heeded to. And when defining citizen or immigrant, we would all fall under the latter.  Each of us, unless we’re Native American, are descendants of immigrants. 

Arizona, has now threatened to pull the plug on the energy plant that provides electricity to parts of California.   The bully-blackout is supposed to chastise L.A. area businesses who hire illegal immigrants.  I’m all about standing up for what you believe (in your mind), but bully-tactics only add insult to injury. 

When you talk to farmers, illegal immigrants fuel the crop industry.  Their presence provides cheap labor and a high production of resources that nearly all of our citizens and businesses depend on.  Let’s face it, the American economy has the highest debt out of all countries in the world.  We can not afford to bite the hand that continuously feeds us, with or without “papers”.  A majority of them are taking the jobs that our own citizens feel are too laborious, or beneathe them.

In response to Arizona’s protests, a boycott-Arizona wave has begun.  Berkeley, California, along with Seattle’s city council unanimously voted to restrict staff from traveling to the state on city business.  An Illinois high school girls’ basketball team has withdrawn from playing in the state’s tournament.  And as the Suns play the Lakers, protestors picket outside of the Staples Center.  Thank God I’m a Celtics fan!

It goes without saying that the 48th state, Arizona, has always been a little Dennis the Menace.  Arizona was openly against supporting the MLK holiday bill at its injunction in 1986.  It wasn’t until 1992 that Arizona finally jumped on the Martin Luther King bandwagon,  and paid homage to MLK day.  Only due to the fact that the NFL would not oblige to a Super Bowl in the state, unless Martin Luther King, Jr.’s holiday was observed.

An immigrant is nearly invisible on American soil.  He or she moves cautiously out and about.  I’m sure next year’s Cinco de Mayo celebrations in Arizona will be cut down tremendously.  So, why is it so hard to become a citizen you ask?  Well, after addressing much of proving this and that, there’s a series of civics questions.  Let’s see if you could pass the U.S. Citizenship Test: Click here

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